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For the last few weeks I’ve felt in a funk when I’m at home. All those things that used to grab my interest, the fun things to do at home, now seem dull.

Computer games are dull.

I still enjoy firing up Civilisation IV for a little while, but my own lack of ability, and disinterest in improving at what is just a game, doesn’t motivate me to keep playing.

The internet, seems vast and dull. A vortex into which time is exchanged for random information that doesn’t prove particularly interesting. An endless spiders web that goes no where.

MSN is a diversion, a time filler for wasting time.

I hate wasting time.

Especially when I’m not enjoying wasting it.

I tried going back to FMG to see what I could find there. Sadly it was disappointing.

Its become even more run down then when I was there, though there are the few interesting people that make the odd return worthwhile.

Books bore me in a way that they have never done. Just the thought of picking up a book and reading leaves me cold. I have all these books on my shelf that I’m meant to read, but I shrug my shoulders and turn away.

Movies seem tedious. The patience required, to sit from beginning to end, I don’t have that anymore. To sit there and be the subject of a barrage of stimulus.

Similarly TV shows feel like too much work. This character wants that from this one, or pointless silly situation contrived to keep the jokes flowing.

Who cares.

Its a surprising change, and one that leaves me at a a loss. I don’t have any thing to occupy me during an evening at home that feels satisfying.

Perversely I still like my evenings at home. I need them to recharge and take stock of the days that might have preceded it. I don’t think I could function without them.

For the first time they’ve become a necessity rather than a pleasure. This is a change I’m going to need some time to deal with. In the mean time though, I’m left very much in the lurch.

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4 Comments

    • A Friend
    • Posted February 6, 2008 at 9:51 am
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    don’t worry when ‘he who must not be named’ returns things will become far more interesting and you’ll have evenings with endless joy and motivation. In the meantime make the most of the dullness!

  1. ah ha! now i understand your srabulous obsession :p

    • Dom
    • Posted February 10, 2008 at 1:11 am
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    Can I assume you don’t think blogging is a waste of time since you are still maintaining it?

    • mtalib
    • Posted February 10, 2008 at 7:40 am
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    Writing is one of the few activities, when I have something to write about, that has increased over this short period. A lot of it has been non-postable material, so there’s not been an increase in blogging per se. Writing is definitely not on the list of things that bore me.


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