We have a ritual.
I wait for a while.
Restart the ritual.
People are complex. Emotions are complex. Thoughts are complex. In combination, the complex interaction of mind and heart is mind boggling, even if we consider it only in the abstract. If we spend the moment to personalise that thought, to recall moments – maybe just one – maybe many – in which we’ve found ourselves paralysed by the rich tapestry of complexity present in human action, it becomes easy to understand.
The Prophet Isabelle read my fortune today, for the coming year of the Ox. In the Chinese zodiac, when the sign of your birth returns, this is considered to be a year of bad fortune. As I am an Ox child, I anticipated her reading with a little doom and gloom of my own, and told the Prophet that I didn’t expect a good year.
There are some stories which we have to understand. Where we struggle to find something that explains what went wrong and what went right because it’s required by the soul. Episodes in life that we can’t leave behind without some understanding of how our path took those turns, and how those twists reveal the road we take today.
I spent this morning contemplating one of those episodes, which happened at the end of September last year. This episode, uniquely peculiar, was done ‘on the record’ through MSN, SMS and email, which makes it ‘revistable’. I took the opportunity to revisit that journey today morning, when I was flicking through my SMS inbox, while waiting for some replies to messages I had sent out.